SYNOPSIS
What happens when you so deeply believe something were told as a child that it becomes the driving force behind almost every thought, feeling and action for the rest of your life - until you decide to take complete control and change your life entirely? For decades, Carolyn Hobdey believed she was 'trouble' and if she wasn't 'nicer' she'd spend her days alone and unloved.
All The Tw*ts I Met Along The Way tells Carolyn's tales of crappy boyfriends, sickening sexual encounters, manipulative men, love triangles, unsupportive and unsupported medical diagnoses... and that's just the first few pages. From porn-addicted boyfriends who go from fitties to owners of 'dad bods,' to car crashes and boob jobs. Marriage to a lover who became more like a brother (and who came out as gay after their 15 year relationship) and later a relationship with a man and his 'ready-made family' that exposes a damaging case of coercive control and narcissism. Carolyn's story exposes the unrelenting pull of the child-parent relationship - even in adulthood - and all the messiness, self-esteem issues and confusion that can cause.
REVIEW
Before I begin this review I just wanted to say that if you are ever in the situation where you feel like you are trapped in a relationship, abused, or feeling like the only option is the end, please there are people who are here to talk. Whether that is a friend, a family member, a colleague, or even on the phone, there is always someone there who will always be there to talk when you are feeling low. I'm going to be providing some numbers at the end of this post if you feel any of the above. Because no matter what you feel right now, you do matter.
This is a gripping book which highlights the relationships of Carolyn Hobdey and her journey of how she was a woman who was struggling, to a someone who is able to see the toxicity in her life and ultimately is able to help others in their own journeys.
Of course there are times when you can clearly see that she makes mistakes, but somehow her decisions of how she corrects them is interesting but also inspiring. To not only identify what was wrong in the relationships she had, whether that be the toxicity of the workplace, or at home, it is admirable how she opens up a dialogue to the reader, to show that you are not alone and you are not going mad.
You can tell that she has a strong character due to her tenacity to achieve the most out of work, but also be able to stand up when she really needed to. In fact, it was truly terrifying at points that I thought that maybe she wouldn't come through. But she didn't disappoint. In fact, if I remember correctly, towards the end I had some kind of pride of how she was able to conquer her problems and fears. It truly is an admirable quality.
I think this is book which should be small bible to those who have some inkling that something isn't quite right in their life. All I can say to family and friends who know someone who might be going through a similar ordeal themselves, it might be time to put this book on their gift list.
Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for providing me a copy to review.
RATING: ***1/2 (THREE AND A HALF STARS)
PHONE LINES
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Mind: 0300 123 3393
YoungMinds: 0808 802 5544
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ChildLine: 0800 11 11
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